If you answered "Agitated" or "Suicidal" in the box above:

We're sorry, but yesterday was the deadline for all complaints. Just kidding! Hey, that's what we do around here, love us or hate us. Please know that all of our cards are meant to be humorous, depending on your sense of humor, which means they're not for everybody. So, if they're not for you, we're cool with that, but we do regret if you're unhappy.

Please Be Advised:

• www.NobleWorksCards.com is Ground Zero for anyone in need of Second Amendment practice. And, if we may share a quick reminder: The U.S. Constitution guarantees Freedom of Speech - you have the freedom not to like our cards or to buy them. It is also believed that at the last minute the following statement was removed from the First Amendment, as a joke, and that the original read as follows: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, to petition the Government for a redress of grievances, and fuck them if they can't take a joke."
• Our cards feature parodies - they by no means preach hate or pass judgment against any particular group, except maybe terrorists of any persuasion. And, much like the Bible, not meant to be taken literally.
• Please consider that most of our jokes, should you find them funny or otherwise, depict or parody real-life situations, regrettably derived from headline news stories and other often-disturbing life events.
• We are equal opportunity offenders - we do not discriminate, we make fun of everybody! Ironically, this fact seems to be of great comfort to most folks who have shared their grievances with us in the past, as if wrongdoing or offense miraculously melts away once inflicted on thy neighbor as well.

Let's not forget we all have a line somewhere, for some it is more like a frontline, for others a flighty belief. Nonetheless, no two lines are created equal. Should yours be crossed, may we suggest you keep calm and carry on - just not on and on and on. No one likes a crybaby.

It has been suggested that laughter is the best medicine - we'll all be happier and healthier if we could take a joke; after all, life is short - our time might be better spent worrying about real-world issues, like global warming and peace in the Mideast. Alternatively, you are welcome to continue ranting and raving over our silly little line of greeting cards. Far be it from us to judge, who knows, it might just be the best way to make this world we live in a better place. We can only hope it would still be as funny.

And, if I remember correctly, the Commandment goes something like, "Thou shalt not kill" and not "Thou shalt not kill over laughing."

Thou shalt Dare to Laugh!